i wish we could all be straight with each other.  but we can't.  

i have things i wanna say, but i ain't gonna say it

things that are built up inside of me, but man, just fuck it

this pain is what drives me to be me, and allow me to express it

in a way that i normally can't, this anger inside, man its about to erupt it

like mt. helen i'll show you bitches how its done

spreading these lines the game is almost won

the pain and anguish is nothing to me but another sun

giving me superpowers like superman, i have become

the only one that can save this world, gods will be done

rumplestilksons took away her only son,

if only she would have guessed his name was nothing but a pun

imma tear this life apart, don't worry about me fools

imma take after 2pac with his lyrics and sick beats too

just think about me like a modern day shakespeare,

giving people a place to escape the shitty life here

he wrote plays with words so exquisite people thought they were at the movies

we got movies in our time, but my words will bring nothing but truthy

when i hop up outta bed you can bet i turn my swag on

cause this life ain't worth shit, as long as i got my money right on

transcendentalism, pecisimism, peace in the middle east bull shit

you ain't gotta worry about anything but yourself man

the next generation can fend for themselves then

cause i got my own problems, and you can bet imma deal with them

i know i'm no jin, i can't free style no shit

but trust me, if you take off the gloves, one on one, you gonna wish you could spit

see, i ain't got nothing to live for no more, just these fucking words and verses

and all i see in life are these people, not friends or family, just pieces of turdess

even my family give me shit for things i been through

not to mention my so called friends don't back me up, true;

you can count on good samiritans cause i am one

seeing a sucka stuck on the road, you betcha imma help'em

making sure other peoples lives is a good one

well thats my job, thats why imma serve'em

see i don't care if you think these words, my words are harsh

cause me?  i take this pain and turn it into an art

my whole life has been wishing i was black,

not so i can have a 20' penis, its just so i can rap

to me its more than just scribbles on a paper

to me its more than just a way to get that paper

soulja boy, let me tell you something sincere

you got good beats but your hear just ain't there

see rapping is more than just boasting about where you came from

its about envisioning a life thats better than where you came from

rhythm and poetry is what the words R A P stand for

so imma put a beat to this, and show you where i came from

i ain't from the hoods, i'm a suburb homey

but you can bet i got problems worse than yours, wanna see?

i got the pressure to succeed like my enemies

they in school getting their doctorette while i bleed

i bleed the blood of my ancestors who sacrificed their life ta'

witness me and my blood getting a life we dreamed ta'

succeed, just the american dream, but i can't seem to see

what the point o' this is to be, to accumulate this wealth that was never meant to be

so what i do to escape this misery?  i write these lines of poetic verses to a beat

in order to please the only one who matters most, that's me.

i wish biggie could hear me, cause he'd agree

there are only so many words in the english language to describe my pain

so i try my best to show my anguish, but in vain

i use a meriam webster and fine the synonyms

to help convey the sorrpw that i feel in him

to think that god would've gave his life for a sack of shit like me

even you and you, you're just mud like thee

i can't rap about god, or his religious beliefs,

cause i'm human and human is only me.

i don't want the fame that comes from preaching his name

i just hope that everyone can hear my lips chapping while i do my thang

as i continue to rap about this worthless sap in vain

i realize that everyone will come to see how much this life causes us pain

the only way to "live life to the fullest" is to do what you wanted

and what i want is not fame or fortune, but for you to realize that this life ain't worth living

but seeing as we're stuck here living and breathing

you might as well make the best of it, short of reaping.

you reap what you sow, so what i sowed is love

but apparently all you can reap is the hate that comes from above

i ask myself what did i ever do?  but realize that it doens't matter what you do

theres no karma, no wrong or right, just what we define to be the strict and guiding light

so do what you please, as long as your happy

and realize that what makes you happy, will never please

those around you cause they just won't believe

that going against the norm, will make you free

these fucking societal rules, make me express myself in ways

that no one will ever see, just on my xanga page

and i doubt anyone will ever read whats on this page

cause the only way i'd put it up, is if no one ever reads this sage.

i'm too shy, too reserved and too asian

to ever show my true feelings, even if i hate them

even after years of this racism

i still say hello when they call me, chinky chong asian

and i have my parents to thank for not being violent,

even though all i wanna do is fucking punch a fool till he won't stop dying

shoot that ass up with a fourty four while i'm driving

so i can climb up the ladder and keep on striving

for a better life that can be bought from materialism

this money, these clothes have got me in a prison

i only care about the next things i buy

the hats, the shoes, the the belts a lie

i learned from my father to bottle up my anger

so here i am bottling it up and letting it go on random strangers

cause i gotta save face and not show it to my neighbours

so what i gotta do?  just leave it bottled up, till i burst open and don't give a mother fuck.

if i were to show one of my neighbours, well that'll embarrass my family

and trust me i'll be disowned quicker than you can say mike connelly

i know that my parents love me so they taught me their chinese ways

but think about this, when did the chinese ever show their pain?

at the most unoppurtune moments i saw the rage

in the history books, june 6th at the tian an men square page?

kids, young adultes, barely 20 of age!

how many students got shot cause they were frustrated with

the socialism, communism, that made them so useless

and to think this is after centuries of imperialistic rule from emperors no older than i was

when i first began to realize how brutal this life was

and thats when i began to idealize a life that i thought would become reality

when a black person running for president would win, against a white man with a salary

to think that such a feat would happen in my time, 

after being made fun of because my eyes were never wide

i'm glad i have a place where i can show my fear

fear of this life and even shed a tear

cause when i think about life i just want a beer

the only way to get through this, is if i'm not even there..................

In the background still hear a melody

Whenever I leave work and trek the streets of NYC I step to a beat

Syncopated with the drips of the rain, like the kick of an 808.  

these rhythmic addictions tic tic is this how i live my day to day

we pacing the same ol' pace

we move fast but get no place

i sometimes have all these thoughts going through my head.  i don't know how to put them into words.  they make me sigh.

i wish my life were a movie.  i love movies, they're so simple.  even the bad ones.  theres a beginning, a middle and an end.  in the middle there is a conflict, but in 2 hours, that conflict is solved, and everyone lives happily ever after.  

even if they don't live happily ever after, the problem is at least solved.  

or at least the problem is identified.  hahahaha, i guess thats a big problem, i don't actually know what the problem is!  :P